A feminist theory of disability would liberate not only disabled women but also non-disabled women because the theory of disability is " the theory of the oppression of the body by a society and its culture."

You feel compelled to be on higher guard against situations like this one while wishing in equal measure that such guard wasn't necessary. Not for you, not for anyone.

My mother saw the success of her activism realised in me.

Flexibility, empathy, inclusion - if these were central values, we would build universally better workplaces where the many talents disabled people offer are unleashed, rather than disregarded and ignored. 

It's a tough balance, wanting to be informed while checking in on your mental state. A balance that is a privilege to maintain.